The parings of the doomed!
by InvaderMeteline
Summary: Meteline discovers a large group of Iz pairings and tells everyone... what happens then? CHAOS! So... everyone dresses up as nijas and screws up on their mission to rid of the annoying fans and pairing! WARNING: many nosebleeds and explosions! will have language... mostly from Zim XD! P.S Did you know Zim was a Farmer? I will be adding more detail cuz it sucks... BYE!


Zim stood in front of his large transmission screen in the bowels of his base, explaining his newest plan to enslave the earth.

" yes that's very nice Zim… uhhh… but I think th-" Red started, but a loud beeping interrupted him.

Zim's eyes widened. " And e-mail?" He said, before, turning his face to the large screen sitting next to the transmission screen.

Zim clicked a few buttons and opened the E-mail.

" **Zim, This is Meteline.**

**You may want to see this… I don't know what to do about it, so maybe you can do something to stop it… the thing im referring to is called : ZaDr.**

**Here is a recently made One Shot story that will help you understand the horrors that have been committed.**

Dib grunted as he gripped Zims bare shoulders and Zim let out and agonizing cry.

Dib pushed harder as he repeated the process, shifting in and out of Zim's…" Zim stopped reading out loud as he skimmed the rest of the page with wide fear filled eyes. He began to shake. " Zim? Zim…. Are you ok? Hey… Zim~" Purple said, trying to regain Zims attention.

Zim turned away from the screen, having finished the page, and began wheezing looking back and forth franticly.

" Zim? Zim… Zim…. Zi- oh dear…" Purple said as Zim slammed his hand on his desk, slowly lowering till he the only thing they could see was from his lips up.

Zim had a million thoughts in is head as his legs failed him, and his hand fell off, as he fell to the floor, unconscious.

" He fainted Sirs, should we cut the transmission?" A near by crew man said, raising his eyebrows in concern at the tallest.

The tallest stood their with wide eyed expressions. " Y-Yeah…"

(WITH DIB!)

Dib stood in his room. Talking to Agent dark booty about a recent chuba cabra sighting.

"AHH! I see… Up date me when you find anyth-" Agent bootie was cut off by a loud beeping noise.

" HEY! And e-mail! Maybe agent fish sticks updated me on that new wolf man sighting. Lets see…

**Dib. This is Zim…"**

Dib frowned and agent dark bootie raised his eyebrow. " Isn't Zim that alien you were talking about?" He said, scratching his chin.

"yes sir… I probably shouldn't even bother reading, but this could be some useful information… maybe, with my luck, he's giving up…" Dib said. " then proceed, if it is important, I will be here to witness it." Dark booty said, moving his little screen to the middle of the room.

" yes sir…

**I have been updated with some recent news, and I assure you, you will not like it…**

**The humans have constructed an evil… well… im not really sure what to call it…**

**They call it by the Name : ZaDr.**

**Here is a recently written one shot story, that Meteline sent me. It will surely prove that this certain evilness must be destroyed. I, myself, after reading, almost reverted to suicide, or turning myself in. But Meteline talked me out of it… Too bad. I heard the jail food is good… oh well.**

**Dib grunted as he gripped Zims bare shoulders and Zim let out an agonizing cry. **

**Dib pushed harder as he repeated the process, shifting in and out of Zims…****"**

**Dib **stopped and he skimmed the rest of the page silently. " Agent moth man? Is their something wro- oh dear…" Dark bootie gasped as Dib let out a scream of despair before his eyes rolled back in his head, slipping out of his chair and slammed against the floor, unconscious.

"This seems like a bad time for you… ill call you back later…" and then agent dark bootie signed out, leaving an unconscious Dib on the floor.

(on the massive.)

Purple and red sat lazily in lawn chairs eating snacks.

" So… Did Zim ever call us back? Usually he would have called us back in these cases…" Red said, raising an eye brow.

" Chill red, maybe he had a heart attack… with our luck, probably not… but you shouldn't worry about that kind of stuff, if he's still alive, he'll call us back! If he's dead then we wont have to worry about him anymore…" Purple said, stuffing a donut in his face.

" Yeah… I wonder if-" A loud beeping sounded the room.

" AGAIN?!" Red shouted, not like being cut off by the same reason in one day.

" Chill red, its just an E-mail." Purple said, sipping on a soda.

" I know, I know… ok… its from…Invader Meteline? Why would Met send us an E-mail? wouldn't it be better to just call us up? Whatever,

**Tallest, my greatest apologies, I would have just called you but with the information im about to share… I would probably executed on the spot.**

**A large group of females humans; from another demention, have constructed an evil thing… called : RaPaZr.**

**Now I must warn you, the following events may be shocking, and almost heart stopping… I have not told Zim of this certain… evilness, for I have all ready told him of something else filled with evilness, if I were to show this to him now, I might not be able to save him from suicide intentions. I will not tell fully explain what it is, but I shall tell you what it means, for the fan art is much to racy for you guys…**

**RaPaZ stands for: Red and Purple and Zim romance/ relation ship…**

Oh god…" Reds voice cracked and he started hyprovenelating.

Purple was wide eyed and clutched his chest gasping. They then broke out screaming and running in circles.

" WHY!" Red shouted, flailing his arms in the air, before running into purple, and they both fell backwards on the ground.

" My tallest?"

(With Tak some were in space.) : im so evil…)

Tak sat in her space ship… well…. The remains of it… in deep space.

She grumbled as she set the coordinates for Earth. Zim would pay dearly for what he did to her…

" Im ready… " She said, before hearing a loud beep, indicating she had an E-mail.

" OHhHH MAIL!" She shouted, before opening it. " Dear Tak, **This is Meteline**…. OHH! Its Met! I wonder how she's doing.

**I have come with terrible news… now…. Before you read on, I want you to make sure there are no ways you could somehow kill yourself…." **Tak looked around the ship with a raised eyebrow and continued.

" **I have to tell you 3 things… for they are considered the worst in your case.**

**They are named TaGr, TaDr, and ZaTr.**

**Please do not kill me for this, for they were created by a rather large group of females from another demention. They stand for: Tak and… Gaz romance…. Tak and Dib romance…. And…Tak and ZIM ROMANCE?!"** Tak let out a hoarse cry and then looked around for something to kill her self with. She ran in circles, freaking out until she ran into the side of the ship, falling unconscious…

Zim sat in a chair, hugging his knees to his chest and rocking back in forth, his eyes were darting every were and he was shaking.

Tak sat on an operation table, writing down notes, and Dib sat in a computer chair by Zim, with a thoughtful face. "There has to be someway to rid of these stupid pairings… im scared to find out what else they've come up with.

All of a sudden the tallest teleported into the lab, looking scared and distraught.

Zim, Being overly paranoid at the moment, jumped out of his chair, screaming, and jumped in Dibs Chair, slipping himself in Dibs trench coat with his antenna peeking out the collar.

Dib, at the moment, had his trench coat zipped up, and looked down his collar at Zim with a not amused face.

Tallest Red raised an eyebrow, and walked up to the group, with purple following suit. " have any of you thought of any ideas?" he said, sitting on a nearby table. The group all frowned and shook their heads.

" There is no way! We've thought of everything, but there too strong! These girls are nuts!" Dib said, waving his arms around, causing Zim to squeal.

" and they probably have an army there… theres no way we can go against them!"Tak said, slumping over.

"And their leader is probably insane… witch would be bad in our case…. I went on line and hacked into the security cams, and they have simulation rooms for fan fics… if they put us in there, they could probably make us do anything they want… I tried hacking into some files that looked suspicious, but they fried my computer… whatever they have they don't want anyone to know about it…"

"ITS ALL MADNESS! MADNESS! AHHHHH!" Zim screamed, making everyone stare at Dib's jacket.

' Its official… we're doomed…" Purple said, slumping over. Gaz then walked; from out of no were!, over to him, pushed him to the floor, flipped him over, and then sat on his back, pulling out her GS2.

" Why are you sitting on me!?" Purple said, struggling. " Because all the other seats are taken…." Gaz said, never looking up from her game.

" Couldn't you have found someone else?!" Purple said in an exasperated tone.

Gaz snickered. " You're the only one wearing purple…. Purple is my favorite color. Pluse, you looked the most comfortable." She said, smiling evil.

Purple sighed and looked away pouting.

" I Give up… im going back home…" Tak said getting up, and walking toward the elevator.

" Me too…" Dib then stood up, putting his arms around Zim so he wouldn't slip out. He had plans with the swollen eyeball…. After some of his own tests of course….

" There has to be some way! We cant just give up! We must go on! Rebel against the fan girl ways!" Gir shouted, shooting out a pipe.

" But how?! We cant even find a way to get IN! And according to my research, THERE ARENT ANY ENTRANCES OR EXITS!" Dib said, waving his arms around, causing Zim to cling tighter to Dib., letting out a squeak.

" We'll find a way! And they have windows don't they! Master has some ninja weapons and some cool suits in the back room… WE COULD USE THOSE! All we have to do is head for the main computer room, an delete all the files and fanfics!" Gir said, sticking his fist in the air in a heroic pose.

"Yeah….. HES RIGHT! WE CANT GIVE UP" Red shouted, standing. Dib nodded, along with the others, and then everyone stared at Dibs jacket, Waiting to hear a reply from Zim.

All of a sudden, a little gloved fist shot out from the collar. " VIVA LA RESISTANCE~" He shouted, muffled by the coat.

Everyone cheered and Met came down the elevator. " HI GUYS! You seem happy. Did you find a way to stop the fan girls?" Met said, smiling, and walking toward them. " NO, but we're not going to give up…" Dib said, smiling.

Met smiled wider and then frowned, looking around. " Hey… Were's Zim?" She said, still looking around.

Dib pointed to his chest, and Met nodded, walking up to him, and unzipped the jacket.

Dib grabbed Zim under his arms, trying to pry him off of him. " NEVER!" Zim shouted, punching Dib in the nose. Dib let go, grabbing his nose. Zim fell on his back, pulling Dibs coat with him. and curled into a tight ball, still wrapped in the trench coat.

" OW! SON OF A MOTHER FUC-"Tak slapped Dib across the face before he could finish his sentence.

Dib scowled at Tak and looked at Zim. " Hey, can I have my…. Or you can keep it…" Dib said, he reached out for his jacket but Zim clung with an iron grip and Dib gave up.

Met reached down and picked Zim up, sat down on the floor Indian style and hugged him to her chest. " So…That's good that none of you are giving up, because there's more." Everyones face sunk and Zim started to shake, eye twitching.

" Some of them don't even make sense, Zim and Gir romance? Zim and lard Nar romance.

Zim and keef romance, Zim and Zim romance, Zim and Zita romance… Gir and Mimi romance. Zim and membrane romance, Zim and Gaz romance, Zim and Mrs. Bitters romance. Lard nar and Tallest romance, Gaz and Gir romance, Gaz and Dib romance, Everyone and Oc romance,

Gir and Dib romance, dib and Grentchen romance, Dib and membrane romance, Gaz and iggins Romance. Red and tallest myuki romance, Tallest pork and Tallest Myuki. Red and Purple romance… and more…"

Zim lay on the verge of tears, Dib had fainted, Tak looked like she was about to have a heart attack, the tallest looked sick, Gaz was retching, and Gir was running in circles.

" MORE?!" Tak exclaimed.

All of a sudden Tears streamed down Zims face. " WHY DOES EVERYONE WANT TO HURT ME?! I donno….." He said, before, burying his face in Met's chest.

" Woah… is he… Crying?" Tak said, tilting her head. " Naw…. " Purple said, dismissing the thought.

" Dude… Zim… are you… alright?" Dib said, finally coming to.

Zim shuddered and stood, holding his stomach and tears streaming down his face.

" NO! IM NOT! DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO SKINNY PUNKS LIKE ME WHEN

THERE ARE FAN GIRLS AND FAN BOY INVOLVED WITH THIS TYPE OF STUFF?! I"LL GIVE YOU A HINT! IT RHYMES WITH GRAPE! It rhymes with Grape…." Zim said, wiping his face.

"He's got a point… fan girls/ boys are insane… they have created something… a…. mind control force…its how they make stories. They use it to make you guys do things to make their stories. Your minds are immediately released and erased afterwards though…

But… to make you guys feel better, you are all still virgins… they just write the dirty parts…"

Meteline said, standing, and wrapping her arms around Zim, rubbing his back comfortingly.

"That's good… but they might use it when we attack… hey Zim, Got any tin foil?' Dib said, rubbing his chin.

" Up stairs…" He said, hiccupping.

" Good, Gir! Go get the Tin foil, I have a plan." Dib said, rubbing his hands together.

( That night)

Everyone is in Ninja suits and have different weapons in their hands and on belts. Along with spiked wrist guards and black combat boots. Everyone has tin foil wrapped around their heads, covered with ski masks.

Every body had a large black belt, equipped with: secondary weapon, five ninja stars, 6 throwing blades, and 3 grenades.

Zim put on his mask and picked out a large black scythe, with blue and red dots rimming the handle, and twin pistils for a secondary weapon. And had two twin machetes on his back. And then slid two blades into his wrist guards. He was wearing a black long sleeved shirt, long black sweats, quickly equipped his belt and weapons in their correct slots before, sliding the scythe in a belt loop. He also wore a black mask that covered everything except his eyes. Black combat boots.

Dib picked a big blue sword, lined with red squiggles. A pair of nun chucks for a secondary weapon. And a boot knife. Dib wore the same out fit as Zim. Black and blue combat boots.

Gaz picked up a machine gun and a bazooka. everyone took a step back. " This is all I need…"

She was wearing a long sleeved black shirt with green and black camo slacks, and the same ninja mask as Zim. And camo combat boots.

Tak wore the same outfit as Gaz, only just regular black slacks, and dark purple combat boots with spiked wrist guards.

She slipped a base ball bat as a secondary weapon and picked up a katana as he weapon, slipping it in its sheith and then putting on the belt.

Met wore a black, long sleeved belly shirt, with dark green pants, and black combat boots with the same mask as Zim and Dib.'

She picked up bag of knives, slipping it in her belt, and then picked up a black handle, that, to the naked eye, looked like the handle to a crock pot.

Met clicked a button on the handle and it unraveled quickly into a sharp blade that looked like the top to a triton, and glowed with electricity, wrapping around her wrist.

The tallest wore the same suit as Zim with the same masks.

Tallest Red picked up a bag of ninja stars and a lazer pistil.

Tallest purple picked up a poison dart gun, and then picked up a battle axe.

The boys all ran down the street, dodging and running behind things trying to look cool Wile Gir and mimi stood behind them, humming the tune from The Spy Next Door.

Met, Gaz, and Tak just walked right passed them, and walked up to the house.

(with fan girls and boys)

A long room filled with office boxes and fan girls and fan boys typing pairing fan fics.

And a room with a long table, lined with employees and a lady in a business suit.

The lady in the suit stood at the front of the table, pointing to a chart.

" And so you see, ZaDr, RaPaZ DaTr, ZaGr and Zatr are the most populare fan pairings of today. So if we write more of those, We'll be the most popular business, Got it?" She said, fixing her black rimmed glasses. Everyone else nodded.

All of a sudden Zim burst through the window along with Dib.

"EVERYONE PUT YOUR HANDS IN FUCKING AIR AND GET ON YOU KNEES!" Zim shouted, pulling out his twin pistils and holding them upside down with his pinky on the trigger (like death the kid from soul eater :D)

Dib looked at Zim with an exasperated look and then said, " REALLY!?"

" Yeah Really! What else was I supposed to do?" Zim said, turning his head but keeping his guns up.

" I don't know! Not that!" Dib said, waving his arms around, before the tallest blew a hole in the wall and then fell on the floor.

" OW! PUR YOU CLUTZ!" Red shouted and then pushed purple off of him, standing and dusting himself off. Purple did the same.

A fan boy stood, reaching for the security button, and then Zim snapped his head over to him, and the fan's arms flew strait in the air.

" I SAID, PUT YOUR HANDS UP AND GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES! IS THAT TO HARD TO DO? DO I NEED TO PISTIL WHIP YOU BITCH!?" Zin screamed, walking over to the boy and resting one of the barrels on the fans neck.

" ZIM! WE CAME HERE TO STOP THEM! NOT SHOOT PEOPLE! That happen to be twise your size…." Dib said, the tallest stared in horror, and Awe at Zim.

" FINE! But if anyone moves again, I wont hesitate to blow their brains out." Zim said, removing the gun form the Fans neck and stepping back, and raising his guns back up.

" Wait… Zim? Like… Invader Zim? OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! ITS THEM! ITS FREAKEN THEM! HAHA" The lady in the business suit said, before snapping her fingers and two bulky men walked up to The group.

Zim pointed his gun at the men and shot, making them fall back on the floor.

" ZIM! OH MY GOD! HE KILLED THEM!" Purple shouted before running over to the guards.

One of the guards grabbed purple, hitting him against the wall, making the purple eyed alien fall unconscious.

" HEY! I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU?" Zim said, pointing toward the guards before seeing the collar of the mans bullet proof vest.

" DAMN! THEY HAVE PROTECTION" Zim shouted, before dodging one of the men who tried to grab him.

" Well what are we gonna do now?!" Dib shouted, dodging a stun gun.

"MY TALLEST! LOOK OUT!" Zim shouted, and Red was tazed, causing him to crumple to the ground.

Dib gasped and then smacked two guys heads together.

" DIB!" Zim shouted before one of the Fans run up behind Dib and smacked his head on a wall.

A large group of fan girls surrounded Zim and held him.

Zim struggled but couldn't get out of their grip. " NO! LET GO! LET GO I SAY! UNHAND ZIM!" Zim shouted, his eyes widened and he struggled harder at the sight of a very large man.

The man elbowed Zim in the ball of his neck making him gasp and pass out.

(later)

Zim woke up with blurry eyes. " W-Were am I?…." He said, before sitting up, only to be welcomed with a head ache from sitting up to fast. He looked around. His ask was gone, and the tin foil was removed, but he still all hav all his gear.

" It looks like a simulation room. But why would they put me her-" The lights flickered on and Zim covered his eyes at the bright light. " naaagh!" His eyes adjusted and he looked to the other side of the room, to see a black sillouette.

" D-Dib?" Dib looked at Zim with half lidded eyes, his lips cracked and his mouth hung open a little.

" Z-Zim. " He sounded pained, and when he reached Zim, he fell, wrapping his arms around zims neck . Zim held the urge to push him away and then pound his body into ground beef.

Dib had his face buried in Zims neck, and he stood.

Something wet and squishy rubbed against Zims neck and he gasped, and then narrowed his eyes. " DID YOU JUST LICK ME? YOU SON OF A- *gasp*" Zim stopped right in his sentence and gripped Dibs shirt, blushing. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a whimper.

Some how, without him noticing. Dib had slithered his hand down Zims pants.

( with jhonen.)

Jhonen Vasquez sat at his desk drawing his latest squee comic.

He suddenly looked up with wide eyes. " whats wrong jhonen?" a random friend of his said, walking up to him.

Jhonenes eye twitched. " I feel a great disturbance…"

( back with Zim and Dib)

Zim let out a little cry and Dib smiled. (WHAT IS DIB DOING?) Zim buried his face In Dib's neck, and looked at his ear.

Zims half lidded eyes got a little wider. THEY PUT A BUG ON DIB! Zim whimpered squeezing his eyes shut and reached his hand up to Dibs neck, slowly inching it to the base of his ear before whispering. " Im going to kill you when we get home.." and ripped the device out of Dibs ear.

Dibs wandering hand stopped and he blinked a few times before looking down at Zim.

" Zim what are you doing?" Zim was clutching Dibs shirt and had his face in Dibs neck.

" Please… stop…" Zim panted, and it took Dib a few moments to register what was happening before his eyes widened and his face flushed. " IM SO SORRY!" He screamed, before, gently pulling his hand out and letting go of Zims neck.

Zim tumbled to the floor, shaking, but then silently got up, and walked up to Dib.

Zim slapped Dib across the face. " Pervert…" Zim whispered, before walking over to a wall, and started groping it.

" OK I deserved that…im sorry! I don't know what possessed me to do that! I rel- what are you doing?" Dib said, gripping his now soar cheek.

" Damn right you deserved it. And the fan girls planted a bug in you, that's why you didn't know what happened when I pulled it out of your ear. And im trying to find an exit."

Zim said, and then finally noticed a large window, with two fan girls behind it, with nose bleeds.

Zim pointed dramatically to them and then shouted: " YOU! YOU-YOU JERKS!YOU MADE ME FEEL VIOLATED BEOND All REASONS! YOU WILL PAY!" Zim shouted before his pak legs unfolded and one started trying to cut the window.

One of the girls smiled, and pressed a button, moving her lips toward a little microphone.

" That wont work… the window is made of plexi glass. You would need an atom bomb just to make a dent in it…" She said, smiling wider .

Zim retracted his spider legs and then looked at them like he was gonna cry, he pitched his voice, and tilted his head down, looking up at them.

" P-Please miss… don't leave me in here… im scared…I don't like it in here…and Dib is mean to me… please…." Zim said, making his voice wobbly.

The girls were filled with guilt. And they looked sadly at him. " Im sorry, we cant let you out, we don't have the key." One of them said.

Zim sniffled. " That's ok… " Zim said, looking down and hugging his knees to his chest.

Dib looked at Zim. Holy crap….

One of the girls' eyes twitched and she walked over, kicking the door open. Zim smiled and strode out… LIKE A BOSS! " SO LONG BITCHES!" Zim shouted, before grabbing Dib by the collar and running out the door.

Zim ran up to a window, and stopped, making Dib run into him. " hey? What gives?" dib said, rubbing his head. This is were they're hiding the tallest!" Zim whispered and walked into an empty room, and then walked to the door to the second simulation room.

Purple and Red were groping the walls for an escape exit. " YO! SLUG BAGS! LETS GO!" Dib shouted.

A fan girl walked up behind the four boys and slammed the door shut.

They're heads all snapped over to the door, and Zim let out an exasperated sigh.

" NOT AGAIN! When I get back, Zims taking a break…" Zim said, plopping down on the floor, next to the wall.

The fan girl laughed evilly into the microphone and slammed her hand down on a button.

Red, purple, and Dibs heads snapped up, and they're eyes sparked. They're heads snapped to Zim and he took a step back. " No…." He said, sticking his arms out, to distance himself.

Dib smiled cutely and silently walked up to Zim, cornering him in the…. Ummm… corner?

Dib got an inch form Zims face, and then pressed his lips against his… Zim let out a gasp, and Dib wrapped his arms around Zims waist. Dib parted them and Zim fell into Dibs arms. " So… Dizzy… cant… nnnng…" Zim said, clenching his eyes shut.

Tallest Red walked over to Zim. Dib stepped behind Zim and wrapped his arms around his waist from behind. Red walked over to face him, and harshly grabbed Zims shoulders.

Zim clenched his eyes shut again and let out a whimper, turning his head away.

Red forced Zim to look at him and then let his grip loosen.

Red Grabbed Zim between the legs and Zim let out a yelp. Red smashed his lips up against his.

Purple walked up and got on his knees, sliding between Zim and Red, and then lifted Zims shirt up, kissing his belly and chest, and Dib gently kissed Zims neck.

Zims eyes went half lidded and he gasped, whimpering.

Zim's mind wandered to the but in Dibs ear earlier. And his eyes drifted to Reds antennas.

*Zims thoughts*

I hate fan girls…. I hate them so much….. Why do I feel like this…. I don't like it… I-it needs to stop… I don't like this feeling…

" please… s-stop…." Zim whined, blush getting heavier every moment.

Zim pretended to wrap his arms around Reds neck and bring them closer. And then reached toward the tip of Reds antenna. In one swift motion, he ripped the little piece of machinery off the tip. Red let out a yelp of pain, parting from the kiss.

Red glared daggers at Zim and then noticed the glazed look over his eyes and raised an invisible eye brow.

Reds eyes drifted downward to purple. And his eyes widened. Stupid fan girls. And then drifted further down to his own hand, and quickly let go, blushing.

Zim panted and then whimpered again. Red looked at his co leaders antenna. And stuck his tongue out in determination.

Red reached down to purples right antenna and clutched the device between his thumb and fore finger.

Purple let out a squeal of pain and elbowed Red in the ribs, still holding up Zims shirt.

" YOU JERK!" Purple shouted. Purples face went blank and he rubbed Zims chest trying to figure out what it was, before turning his head to it. He looked up and quickly let go of Zims shirt, making it unravel just above Zims belly button.

Purple stood, and then bitch slapped Red. Red looked flustered for a moment and then slapped purple back.. This started a brutal bitch slapping war.

Red turned his head to Dib that was still sucking on Zims neck, and walked over to them, reaching behind Dibs head, pulling off the small device.

Dib blinked a few times and then looked at Zim. Dib smiled sheepishly.

Zim now had three little purple/brown marks on his belly, and 4 on his neck.

Dib let go and Zim quickly spun around, slapping Dib across the face, leaving a large, three fingered hand print on His right cheek.

Red and purple looked at Zim wide eyed, as he walked up to them. Zims eye twitched, and walked to the other end of the room, and sat in a corner. A purple aura surrounded him like a cloud. Everything was silent before the fan girl tapped on the window.

She clicked the button on the microphone. " I just got a letter from the fan girls down the hall that said: Beware Zims evil cuteness… do any of you know what that means?" She said with a raised eyebrow.

Dib smiled lightly and then turned to Zim. " Are you a Zim fan?" Dib said. The fan girl raised an eye brow, " yes…" She said, a hint of suspiciousness in her voice.

Dib strode over to Zims emo corner and whispered in his antenna. "hey… how are you feeling?" Dib whispered. Zim hugged his knees closer to his chest. " Violated…." Zim said, letting out another whimper.

The tallest raised they're and eye brow at this. Dib then whispered something to Zim and his antenna flew up, he then turned and grabbed Dib by his ear, down to His eye level, whispering something that sounded like a threat.

Zim then stood, punched Dib in the stomach and walked over to the Window with his head down.

" Hey…. Let me out…." Zim said. Glaring daggers at the girl.

" not a chance…" She said, crossing her arms, smirking.

Zim then pulled multiple ninja stars behind his back, the girl then watched curiously, raising an eyebrow.

Zim lashed out, throwing a group of ninja stars at once, making the girl fall backward in her chair, they cut threw the window and just missed her.

" what did you tell him?" Red asked as Dib walked by in a victory march. " you'll see."

Zim growled, pulling out his twin pistils, and holding them upside down, his pinkies on the trigger.

He fired furiously, eyes narrowed and he flashed his spiky white teeth.

" Yup…. Zim's pissed…" Dib said, crossing his arms.

Zim let out a frustrated growl, and put his guns in his pockets before jumping up and round house kicked the screen.

After many failed attempts he looked at the ground in defeat.

Zim flipped his head up, facing the fan. His eyes were filled with tears.

" PLEASE MISS! Please let me out! I promise I'll be good… I PROMIS! Please… they scare me! Its scary and dark in here! Please let me out… it didn't feel good when they touched me like that…" Zim sniffled. And the tallest looked at him with dumb founded stares.

The fan girl looked at him sadly and then looked away dramatically. " NO! THE CUTENESS! TO STRONG! MUST ! RESIST! AGGG!" The fan girl then banger her head on the table repeatedly.

She lifted her head and lifted the plexi glass window and cracked her lips open to say something but was cut off buy a loud boom.

Blood and organs splattered all over Zim's Face and ninja suit. Dibs eyes widened and covered his mouth.

The tallest stared in horror and awe. Zims eyes widened and he opened his mouth, letting out a cry of horror. " Oh my god!" He screamed, tears stinging his eyes and fell to his knees.

Mets arm was still extended, as she stared down at the group.

She retracted her weapon and slid it in her belt. She silently walked over to Zim and stuck her hand out to him. "They'll be coming…there's security cameras every were."

Met said, Zim recoiled a bit and Met got an irritated face, grabbing Zim by the shoulder, and yanking him upwards.

Zim let out a small cry and winced.

" Oh come on… Dib… you were the one who wanted Zims guts on a table… and tallest, don't you kill at least 10 Irkens a day…. And Zim… didn't you kill thousands of you own kind in a planet mix up? C'mon guys! You should be okay with that!" Met said waving her arms around.

"No! This is the first time I've EVER! Seen anything explode all over me! I never even saw any of the bodies back on irk!" Zim shouted, still shaky.

" Oh yeah… But seriously… you guys are sissies… do you KNOW what she was going to do next? Zims cuteness bit was only stalling… BTW! I taught him that move…. " Met said, crossing her arms.

Zm just shuddered and looked down sadly. " Yes… it is true… hey… were are Gaz and Tak?" Zim said, hugging his stomach.

All of a sudden, Met launched for Zim stuffing his face in her breasts. " RANDOM BOOB HUG! Gaz told me to random boob hug people when they say her name!" Met said smiling.

"HMMMMMMMM!" Zim screamed, muffled. Met let go and he plopped to the floor in a star pose, his eyes were swirly, and he had a rather large nose bleed.

" oh yeah… they should be here right… about…. Now!" Met shouted as Gaz walked in, dragging Tak like a rag doll. Gaz looked at Zim, covered in blood and organs, and then frowned.

" Lucky… I didn't even get to see it." Gaz said, crossing her arms.

She then noticed zims nose bleed and posture and then smiled, and chuckled.

Met put Zim on her back in a piggy back and signaled the others to follow her.

" NOT SO FAST!" the lady in the business suit said. And then multiple fan girls and boys surrounded the group.

Everyone unsheathed their weapons,

Gaz pulled out her bazooka, and the large group of fans cleared a path.

The group ran down the hall. Met gave them a hand guesture to stop when they came to a corner. She pulled out a few ninja stares and peeked around the corner. She threw the stars and a few muffle " ooomfs" and slices were heard, and Met gave them an " OKAY" signal, rounding the corner and running down the hall.

They came to another corner, And stopped, Met peeked over the side, and then snapped her head back over to Dib, who was right next to her. " Theres too many!" She whispered.

Zim stuck hiss hands up. " I got Dis!" And then walked to Gaz. " " Can I borrow you automatic?" Gaz reluctantly gave him the giant machine Gun and tucked it in his Dibs coat, that he was still wearing.

He then walked out in the middle of the hallway. "What is he doing!?:" Met whispered.

All of the guards turned to him, with wide eyes. " I AM A FARMER!" Zim Shouted.

Met face palmed. One of the guards chuckled, and crossed his arms. " Oh, and what kind of farmer are you then, Zim?"

Zim pulled out the machine guns. " IM A LEAD FARMER MOTHER FUCKERS!" Zim screamed before firing the gun before anyone could think of drawing there weapons.

Zim then broke out in an evil laugh while he fired.

Met, Dib, the tallest, and Tak all stared at Zim with wide eyed expressions.

Zim then tossed the gun back to Gaz and strode down the hall, stepping on the dead bodies.

" Cool…" Gaz said, walking down the halls.

Everybody looked at each other and then back at Zim, and started following him. " He gets that from you, ya know…" Dib said, poking Met in the side.

" Yeah…. Hes like a little mini me!" Met shouted, making a squee noise.

They walked to the computer room, witch was now empty because of Zim and Gaz's machine Gun.

Gaz pulled out her machine Gun and shot half of the computers while the tallest when planting grenades by each one.

Everyone quickly left the room, and Met closed the door locking it…

A loud boom sounded, causing the door to fall off its hinges, and revealed the now soot covered empty room.

" HEY! YOU! IM NOT FINISHED YET!" The lady in the suit came running down the hall toward them.

Met was about to step forward and just slice her head off, but then the lady pulled out a rifle.

Zim ran up to the lady, dodging the random shots, and then came up behind her, slipping the kuni out of his wrist cuffs, and shooting them at her. They went right threw her, and splattered blood every were.

Gaz pulled out the bazooka, and everyone stepped back with wide eyes.

Gaz pulled the trigger, causing the lady to fly threw the wall, and explode…

There was a long silence before Met stuck her arms in the air. " YAY!"

Later.

Everyone sat in Zim living room.

Tallest Red sat next to Tak and Tallest purple on the floor. Purple was laying on his stomach, courtesy of Gaz.

Met was laying on the couch with Zim laying face up on top of her, with the back of his head on her chest.

Dib sat on Mets legs on the other side of the couch. And Gaz sat on Tallest purples back, playing her GS3.

" Ok…. So…. We stopped the large source…. But the pairings will never go away… they're too popular… sorry guys…. But there wont be any fanfics for a few months! Hooray!" Met said, laptop on Zims stomach.

" Well, at least we tried." Dib said, sighing.

"I hate fan Girls…" Zim muttered.

" Don't worry Zim! Some fan girls hate pairings but have the sanity level the size of a pinto bean and want to do thing to you that we could all get sued if the writer put it in this story.…" Met said, patting him on the head.

" Yeah…. Hey.. Why Is everyone still in my base? Don't you have anything else to do besides lazing around on my floor, and ….. On my legs…. " Zim said, sitting up.

Met reached up and pulled Zim back on top of her. " Calm yourself Zim-kun… they Did help get rid of the Fan base." Met said, and started blowing on his antenna.

" Why are you touching me?" Zim said, twitching his antenna.

" Because I know you cant do anything about it because I'm at least 5'6 and your 4'11."

Met said, and poked his head. " HEY!" Zim shouted.

Dib reached over and poked Zim in the forehead. " Yeah! Your puny!" He said sticking his tongue out.

Zim Growled and launched for Dib, Tackling him off the couch.

" JUST BECAUSE YOUR BIGGER, Doesn't MAKE YOU MORE POWERFUL!" Zim shouted.

Dib Rolled them over so he was on top, he held Zims arms down so he couldn't flip them..

He smiled at Zims struggles. " You wanna bet?" Dib said, getting inched from his face.

Zim winced and blushed a deep red… " oh god… please don't tell me you still have a bug in you…" Zim said, grimacing.

Dib blushed and sat up a little. " NO!" Dib yelled.

" Then why are you still on top of me… why are you breathing down my neck, and why did you just ask if I wanna "BET'?" Zim said. Dib looked flustered for a moment and then growled.

Dib then grabbed Zim's antenna, yanking hard.

Zim let out a loud yelp, freeing both hands and reaching up, trying to pull Dibs hands off.

" Dib… stop it. that's enough…" Tak said, frowning. Gaz opened one eye.

Dib began to squish and mangle the antenna, and Zim's eyes widend, before he clenched his eyes shut, screaming in pain. Everyone's heads snapped over to the pair.

Zim let out a cry of pain and Gaz walked over and picked Dib off of Zim, throwing him to the side.

Met picked I'm up and put him in the position they were in earlier on the couch.

" DIB! Why did you do that? It was just a stupid comment he made! He does it all the time!

You need to chill your nuggets, TO THE CORNER OF SHAME WITH YOU!" Met shouted and Dib's eyes widened, before he looked sadly at Zim and then slumped over, trudging to the corner of shame.

Met hugged Zim.

" Hey… why dose the runt keep getting all of the attention?" Red said, crossing his arms.

" Why, would you like a hug Red-kun?" Met said, smiling evilly.

" Yes…. Yes I would." Red said, nodding his head and closing his eyes.

Gaz then walked over to him and sat on his stomach.

"Gaz… can you get off?" Red said, Gaz got back up and walked to the kitchen.

Met then ran up to Red and stuffed his face in her chest in a tight hug. " YOU SAID GAZES NAME!" Red let out a squeal and an evil chuckle can be heard from the kitchen.

She let got and Red plopped on his back with swirly eyes and a nosebleed.

Met then stuck her arms in the air in a victory pose.

" BOOB HUG FOR THE WIN!"

The end… AND MAY DA CHEESE BE WITH YOU!

*flys away on a flying rainbow zombie ninja fish with golden lazer eyes.


End file.
